neutraltwin and I Skype'd and babbled about what I just made him do. Summary? Pokémon was involved.
Transcript of loltakes 01
hanae0711: You shimmer like a radiant topaz!
neutraltwin: Yes, that's exactly what I shimmer like.
hanae0711: "You're intoxicated by my very presence," I mean, god! How did you recite that line without laughing out loud?
neutraltwin: Um. I don't know. It was ridiculous. That's actually in the book?
hanae0711: It's actually in the book.
neutraltwin: And look at that bit. There's this line, right?
neutraltwin: That goes:-
He didn't answer at first; he simply bent his face to mine, and brushed his lips slowly along my jaw, from my ear to my chin, back and forth. I trembled.
neutraltwin: That sounds like he's just rubbing his face on her.
hanae0711: He... He is a sparkly cat.
neutraltwin: Yes. That's exactly right.
hanae0711: Made of stone.
neutraltwin: Radiant topaz!
hanae0711: An unknown stone, which happens to be a radiant topaz! Or marble! Sometimes.
neutraltwin: Anything shiny.
hanae0711: Mmhmm. Maybe he's Meowth.
neutraltwin: Yes, that's the third book; Edward turns into a Pokémon.
hanae0711: Everything can be made better with Pokémon.
neutraltwin: Yeah. You can just see the, uh, whole amorous scenes. "Edward removed his pants, and the entire room lit up in his lumescent tumescence."
hanae0711: Oh, you don't know, I think in the book where they finally get married, it's like she becomes horny non-stop. It's like, "I want you, I want you more!" And never mind the fact that, you know, they're hunting for blood and stuff, and she just gave birth.
neutraltwin: ..... Nope.
hanae0711: And I think she- She gives birth after, what? Two months or something. Very, very short period of time. And...
neutraltwin: Yeah, that's- That's how long it takes for magical sparkly vampire babies to gestate.
hanae0711: You are wise in the ways of sparkly magical vampires. No wonder you're voicing one.
neutraltwin: Yes. Hopefully I'm Cedric Diggory enough for it.
Also, due to popular demand, here's his 'INTOXICATED' line! Have fun!